Today's events made me soo..: 
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Sweet Melodies: Doushitte Kimi Wo Suki Ni Natte Shimattan Darou
Yeah sooo...
Goin to William's tomorrow night. =D
Cause Mike invited me, Darlene and Misheck over =D
and Will lives there and stuff lol.
But yeah. I'm gonna be polite and shizz and if I'm tired.
BEST BELIEVE..I'm taking a nap.
AND...I may ask William if I can play on his PS3; then go upstairs an play on it the entire time..
=D Should be fuuuuuuuuuuun...But who knows what I'll end up doing...I hope they have food cause I know I'm gonna be STARVING...
I need to pick out what to wear tomorrow..
cause I seriously want to just not wear clothes again tomorrow.
I just wore leggings and a tee shirt today and I was super comfy.
I wanna be super comfy tomorrow too..
SO ... I dunno..I gotta find out...
I'll go upstairs and see what I'm in a feel for..
So yeah..
ummm.....I want soup..I have no money on my card and it makes me cry. lol
I had mad gas today like..whoa..I'm never drinking starbucks again..
I think that's why i was so hyper..hyperactive der..
yeah. I am hyperactive..
UGH!!! I seriously don' want to go to physics tomorrow...
but! I kinda have toooo....
ew.
y'know. I used to actually be upset that I couldn't joke and make William laugh and shit..
but now..I really don't care..cause I can talk to him...like..however I want. And harrass him and stuff and he just sits and takes it caue he's my friend lol..and I'm like.."hmm.. now that I think about it I don't constantly laugh with every single one of my friends. But I just love the fact that all the people I consider my friends. I can talk to. Point out random stuff to..like I can do that with Will now. like...it's come to a point where I've realized I need to focus on myself. My friends will always be my friends. The won't abandon me just because I don't talk to them. I just wanna live and be me and focus on becoming one of the greatest most well renouned crazy architects/designers/cartoonists/illustr
ators/artists that ever lived. (I know Will, Misheck(especially) and Phil are gonna be my competition..I'm gonna top them..believe it. (gabby too. Her designs are cool. As for the cartoon side..CHUCK AVERY. Man was a charater genius. I want my characters to be as memorable as his. And for the art part: Jeremy Hartley. the truest artist that ever lived no doubt. I love that little man and I do miss him..)) Love will come eventually. Me and William's relationship will bud as long as I don't butt in and don't push anything and just let things flow and let God do his biz.
I like being happy even when i'm sad. I do that by praising God for allowing me to wake up and gracing His presence on me and protecting me and loving me in everyway even when I take advantage of Him. I apologize and pray that no matter what happens on this day that it's all a result of your will. Even if I have a disappointing day. I want to live that day fully for him. And talking to whoever he wants me to talk to. Yeah duh I always wanna talk to Will. But I know I don't have to put myself in his line of sight. or get noticed. Like how he comes down with Misheck I go up with Darlene. lol Then we interact. Darlene directs to him and me alot and Misheck directs to me and Will alot. They do equal for each other simply cause they talk to each other alot already. lol. Then we just address each other whenever we want. He's..so honest to the point it's bold and can come off as sassy and rude. But he's really just being honest. All he does is say what he feels he wants to say. And alot of the time it's corny and funny...and even more times it's rude. lol But it's Will. Just like how I say ditzy stupid crazy silly bold rudish sweetsy honest and I guess random? things alot just because I feel like saying it. But it's me. I get hyped up. I get super excited. I get loud. I laugh with everything I have. I laugh at almost everything. I laugh til it hurts. I smile almost all the time. I make a big deal of things. I get easily distracted. I like shiny things. I don't talk to you unless I have something to say to you that involves you in some manner or form. Or I just feel like saying it to you. Point is. That's just me. And the more Will talks to me..the more he sees and just accepts that...he's good at that..not caring and accpeting things..but I cross one boundary at a time. I kinda know what he won't care about and what he does. I can go on his computer but can't like take it and be all crazy with it..I have to be extra careful. He's finiky about his stuff...umm....another thing I learned is...he really doesn't care..about alot...lol umm...but he looks out for his buddies...Speaking of which..I gotta clarify the solutions to all my ordeals...cause he does ask about them meaning he apparently genuinely cares..I may talk to him in the morning or something...about it...or something...whatever.
But yeah...I know I have friends. I know who they are. I've been ignoring myself however.
I kept thinking to have friends I had to be something like Darlene and steal the attention..but I have no idea what to do with it when i have it..I realized I can be myself. I honestly have nothing to say until i feel like saying it or..I just have something to say...I will blurt it out if I feel like it. i miss the moment sometimes cause I'm off in a daydream...oh. William also mumbles to himself but he won't say what he says...=/....misheck is like..my older brother...number two. and darlene is like my older sister lol..they're so wonderful..when the four of us just chill..we all just talk to each other. when misheck and darlene are foolin around me an will just chat it up about people that pass by or whatever random outburst i may say..it's pretty cool..i act like a destructive teen with misheck while darlene plays around with will.
It's all awesome. I like the four of us just hangin out. I don't hang with them for most of the day so..yeah. I mean. i dunno. that class is just cool. Me and gabby are friends of friends. lol we can laugh and stuff with our friends and we address each other and say hi but I wouldn't call us friends. I simply don't talk to her like that yet. I never hang around her so I'm just not comfortable with her much...but I'm chill with everyone in that studio. i say hi and chat for a bit at times.
It's fun..being me...going outside to chill by myself..
I really wanna improve my drawing..
heidi-overdosin
I kinda like that song.
Kimora makes me laugh. She's always herself. No matter what that is. That's why I love her. She always encourages people to be beautiful and be themselves. All the time.
=D
I really want some ginseng soda.
I love my life..cause it's not going in my direction. It's going in God's...and ...I'm happy about that..it's tough..cause I rarely get what I want..and money's a pinch..but I'm still happy and content..
I give off an illusion of business lol..wonderful...
there are so many books I wanna buy...when we went to Will's house I was sitting down and Mike was like "why are you so quiet I thought you wanted to see the house right?" and practically immediately I was like "ok let's go upstairs!" and I just like shot up and ran up stairs and mike followed. lol and misheck and will and darlene were laughing at me and misheck was like "that was quick" lol..so I saw will's room and I yelled that it was a dump and he was like it's messy cause I haven't put away anything yet! and I was like oh. then I went into mike's room and he has like a mini architecture library and has like..sooooo many shoes that it could be another foot locker..but misheck has more..wow...and so anyway..I saw dwayne's room and it was cool. I used the bathroom. The rooms smell nice. I told william I was stealing a shirt but then I took it back cause the shirt I wanted to steal was a gift from his sister..soooo I was in the midst of choosing another shirt when he kept saying no and said he'd buy me one when he goes back home this winter break. and I told him ok..make it a long sleeve one and he said ok I said thank you then went back upstairs and looked at mike's books with darlene. and will came up and i was just comming out of his room and I went back into mike's and so I he came out of dwaynes room with a blankie and I was like "that your blankie?" and he was like no it's old I'm throwing it away.. and so we all ended up in mikes room talking about books and teachers and misheck was like comfy and watching the game lol..then we eventually left like..5 min after we came back down stairs. and he was like you guys are gonna come over and hang tomorrow right? and me and darlene were like..SURE! lol
so yeah.
Mike's place tomorrooooow....I'm gonna need juice and banana cake. then maybe I can ask for a 200 buck stipen for the next month? lol
yeahh...
I'm tired and thirsty and hungry...I just want some soup..so I can umm...sleep and eat and...I need to pick out my outfit tomorrow..it's gonna be hot and I'm gonna porbably walk around tomorrow..or chill outside..I'm gonna go walk around the reservior tomorrow....just relax some..I'm gonna wear my skirt cause i don't wanna wear pants and I wanna flow. =D I may wear jeans...i dunno..I'll find out tonight when I put it on. mmm I may just wear the dress and bring my jeans to change into when i don't wanna be so open and I'm tired of the dress...wither jeans or some sweat pants...i need new ones...colored ones...
I wanna buy so many architecture and art books like..it's crazy..I may just sit in borders one day and just...like...draw lol out of the book since I can't buy it yet...yeah...my christmas list is gonna be full of books. i wanna start up y own library like my daddy. =) and read them all and draw something from them all...like..I wanna develop in my art but i feel indered cause i don't understand the body muscles fully..especially for men..and I don't have any programs...I think I'm gonna bring my laptop tomorrow..and see if I can install a softwear will has lying around somewhere..misheck has it..I'm gonna ask him..to do mine tomorrow..
really want some juice.
and cake...lol...
Ok I need to wake up an excersie tomorrow.
ok
..v
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UGH!
tired
sad
lonely
happy
determined
awake
accomplished
merg..
bouncy